Saturday, March 20, 2004

haha..super dumb cool mormon names..get urs today!

My Mormon name is Roshawna Kaltighanna!
What's yours?


XOXO,
6:25:00 PM

Friday, March 19, 2004

am feeling shitty right now.
have been feeling shitty for de past few days.
anger.confusion.lost.edgy.grumpy.sick.
lethargic?..maybe?

all these feelings bottled up inside..
how do i define them?..one by one?
how do i tell them out when i dunt even noe how to define and differentiate my own feelings?

sometimes i dunt even noe what im feeling.
sometimes i dunt even noe why im feeling this way.
sometimes i dunt even noe why i get angry and confuse over.
i jus do.
sometimes i dunt even noe why im so sensitive to words.
sometimes i dunt even noe why i let the smallest stupidest things affect me so much.
sometimes.sometimes.somtimes.

sometimes its really hard when i cant let all these feelings out in the open.

sometimes i just simply hate myself.

*clicks myself on ignore.*
maybe im jus tired?
*ponders*

XOXO,
3:52:00 AM

Monday, March 15, 2004

Life for Rent

i met up with my Bestest friend Fara yesterday.
One of the few Frens ive always Looked up to.
One of the few frens that ill never ever forget for the rest of my life.

Its beautiful how our frenship still lives on despite being so far apart from each other.
We dunt see each other everyday like we used to in our sec skool days.
we dunt even tok to each other on the fon on a daily basis anymore due to our own personal commitments.
But at the end of the week,there will always be an sms from her to noe how im doing so far.
There will always be a simple msg that tells me that at least sumone remembers me out there despite all these hectic days.
and thats the whole point i guess.

She has always been there for me right from the very beginning.
shes been there when everyone else had hated me in sec skool.
shes been there when everyone had pointed their fingers at me.saying that its my fault.
shes been there when i cried over my lost first love.
shes been there when my very own bestfren left me.

and all the while,she juz stood in the corner not saying a word.
she ll be right there where i left her.
Just for me to cry my hearts out abt over my pathetic miseries in life.
it doesnt even matter to her whether or not im at fault.
It doesnt even matter to her that i forget her presence when im with my frens at tt time.

I never did realised the magnitude of her frenship with me till 2 years ago.
when everybody that mattered most to me left.
and yes.
she was still standing there waiting for me.
to listen .
to cry wif.
to scream wif.
to laugh wif.

ill always remember those days where we use to run and get drenched in the rain.
stepping on water puddles at the reservoir splashing dirty water at each other in the rain.
after skool.
coming back home wif dirty mud stained skirts.and blouses.
all those times we digged for earthworms together.
and how we used to have our quiet heart to heart talks on our way back home from skool.
all those nicknames we gave to everyone we hated in class.
when we drew funny faces on our classmates faces in photographs.
how we dreamt abt the future ahead.
what we wanted to be n achieved.
and our promises of staying in contact no matter what happens.

she may not be perfect in anyone's opinion.
And i dunt give a damn to what society thinks of her.
shes perfect in my eyes.
and thats all tt matters.
she is and will always be the bestest fren to me.
Thank you Fara;)




XOXO,
5:58:00 PM

Sunday, March 14, 2004

Coz everybody noes that Little Smurfs are clever.

I need to choose My Specialization by the end of this week.
and im as confused as a Blind Duck.

Software programming is Out of the question.
Elogistic's kinda simple.
(actually, THE simplest)
Multimedia 's abit more challenging n cool.

*blurs*
what to choose what to choose what to choose what to chooose..?

i need some sleep.
ZZzzzzzZZZzzzzZZZZZZZzzzZZ.

XOXO,
8:26:00 PM


Undesirable No 1

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